No pictures this time ( the gardens are kaput) but I wanted to share with you what has been going on around here.
So, since the gardens are done this year and Justin has started his new job (he does NOT work from home anymore), I’ve had a lot of time for introspection and for my artwork. For the past 4 weeks I’ve been spending everyday from 12p-7p working on my artwork and taking freelance jobs. Usually I start by 11a and work until 11pm. It’s always a long day.
Anyway, while I’m using that to make money, I’ve also had some time to learn things about myself and I’ve learned quite a bit. Up until now I’ve just been too busy to listen to myself. Well, I finally figured out why I have such a hard time focusing, it’s because I just have too much to do. Most likely all of you are shouting “duh!” at the screen, but I truly did not know. I’ve always followed what I wanted to do, no matter how much ridicule I received from friends, family, and strangers. Because of that ridicule and constant questioning, I’ve taken it upon myself to prove that I can do anything if I put my mind to it. So, for the past 6 years, that’s exactly what I did. You think I can’t fix my own car? Fuck you, watch me. You think I can’t make money off art? Jokes on you, been doing it for years. Just stuff like that.
During that time I’ve picked up a lot of skill sets from things I needed to prove and things I was interested in. For 6 years I’ve been toting all these skills and their supplies to every single living space we have owned. Not only is that a lot to ferry physically, it’s a lot to carry mentally. I reached a point where I could barely get out of bed from mere mental exhaustion. My mind was sprinting 24/7 and I didn’t have the energy to keep up with it. Two months ago I finally started drawing in my sketchbook again after a 3 month break. After a month of sketching, I couldn’t stop myself and it finally dawned on me. This is what I’m supposed to do. I’ve known it since 4th grade, but for some reason, I forgot or let people convince me otherwise.
So four weeks ago I decided, when Justin went to his new job, that I was going to finally commit and work on my art, treating it like a full time job. So that’s what I did and it’s been wonderful. By the end week two I was starting to run out of steam, so I gave myself a break to think and it finally dawned on me what I was doing. I couldn’t stop thinking about all those other art supplies and had and that I wasn’t using them. So I did the only logical thing I could do, I got rid of them. Most were donated to art friends, some were sold, and the rest were trashed. All I kept were my drawing supplies and my watercolor supplies. After that I burned all my art that I’ve been holding on to for the past 12 years. I only kept the very best pieces and even then it was less than 10 pieces
After all that, I was feeling really refreshed, so I started going through the house. We sent quite a few things to goodwill, 2 tubs of books to the library, lots of stuff to the dumpster, and even some to the firepit. I cleaned out all our closets, sold all our canning jars, and cleaned out the kitchen cupboards. Even today I found more things to go through and cleaned out drawers, jars, and shelves.
You would not fucking believe how much crap we had from family that gave us hand-me-downs when we moved in here. I appreciate their help, sincerely, but I didn’t even need one pressure canner, much less three. Also have no idea why we needed three sets of dishes and four sets of silverware. All those things got donated so someone else can use them.
Anyway, with all that stuff moved out, as cheesy as it sounds, my mind feels more cleaned out as well. It’s easier for me to think and be creative.
So what does this have to do with minimalism? Well I watched the minimalism documentary again yesterday and the one thing that really jives with me is this:
If a possession does not bring you happiness or utility, get rid of it. Absolutely do not keep anything that causes you stress.
I can’t agree with this more. So that’s what I’m doing. I’m continuing to go through the house and removing things that don’t make us happy (now I just have to get Justin to do the same).
It feels good.